Remembering my Mom

     I'll going to be painfully honest today.  October is really a difficult month for me.  In fact, I have cried many times this month.  Just typing this brings tears to my eyes.  I remember so much about my mom this month and I cry because she is gone and I think of the horrible debilitating disease, Alzheimer's, that took her from me three years ago.  It robbed her of her identity and her connection to family and friends..  So today I write about my mom.

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Mom and me in my Easter dress and bonnet on my slip and slide

My mom, Doris, was a very gentle person.  She had a very strong faith and was devoted to God, her family, and friends.  Growing up I can remember her reading the Bible each evening before bed.  I think some of my fondest memories with my mom involve the simplest things.  She took delight in the small things in life.  One thing I remember she taught me is to look at the cumulus clouds, but I liked to call them the big fluffy cotton candy clouds.  She showed me how you can look at them and imagine pictures of dogs, trees, mountains, dragons, and unicorns.  So if you have never taken the time to look at the clouds or you haven’t done so in a while, I encourage you to do so no matter what age you are because there is a special magic and peacefulness you feel when doing it.  I remember her teaching me how to go crawfishing.  For those of you that don’t know what a crayfish is—they are scary little crustaceans with beady little eyes and scary pinchers like lobsters.  We would go to the ditch in front of our house after a rain and we would see their piles of dirt around the hole to their house.  Mom would put some salt pork or a little raw bacon on a string with a little horseshoe nail for a weight and she would drop it into the hole just a little bit.  A crayfish just might slowly crawl to the top, grab the pork with their pinchers and then try to pull it back further into their hole, but then of course we would pull them out of the hole while they were still attached to the string.  I would usually scream and mom would tell me to be quiet and put the crayfish in the big bucket we had brought with us.  I might try to do it, but I couldn’t ever grab them though because I was terrified the pinchers would grab me.  So in the end it was always Mom who put them in the bucket.  We could do this for a long time and she would delight in how they scared me, but would still try to touch me with one.  I remember once it rained and rained and the pasture flooded and King’s Creek overflowed.  We took a long walk with our bucket and caught tons of crayfish-well maybe not tons but it looked like it to a little girl.  Now you may wonder what we did with all these crayfish.  Did we cook’em and eat’em?  Are you kidding?  Now maybe my dad and mom had eaten them at some point, but we never did.  We kept them in the bucket with some water and mud for a while and then we released them and the little creatures with their beady eyes and scary pinchers would scurry happily away.

     My mom will be remembered for her wonderful cooking, especially during the holidays when she welcomed family and friends in her home.  I will remember her teacakes, pecan pies, homemade biscuits and cinnamon rolls.  On some mornings, for no reason, she would make me the most wonderful melt in your mouth delight—chocolate gravy with biscuits and butter.  Mom had a system to her cleaning and cooking.  Every day of the week she had chores to do and she wouldn’t stop until they were finished.  We often teased her and told her that house was so clean we could eat off the floor.   When my dad was a route salesman for Coca-cola, he loved his pinto beans.  He said they were his “go” food.  So every Sunday, mom would start getting the beans ready.  She made a huge pot of beans.  I thought the beans were great on Monday, usually pretty good on Tuesday, but not so good on Wednesday or Thursday, but Dad had to have them every night except Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.  This went on for years until my dad hurt his back and was no longer a route salesman for Coke.  After this, when she made pinto beans and cornbread, it was a treat we loved and they were delicious.  She would often send home a quart of pinto beans home with me cause Michael and I loved them so much.  Nobody made beans like my momma!

     My mom loved to laugh and I am thankful to have inherited this love of laughter from her.  She would say it’s better to laugh than cry.  She was also quite a trickster.  She would come up behind someone and touch the back of their knee and if they were relaxed this would cause them to almost fall to the ground.  Then she would just laugh and laugh.  She also would come up behind those she loved and give them donkey kicks.  A donkey kick is where you stand beside someone and lift your leg at the knee sideways and tap or sort of slap their bottom with your foot.  She had this down to a fine art.  Now I have done this to Michael , Jordan , and Sarah, but I have never achieved her level of proficiency.

     Mom truly had a grateful heart and she didn’t ask for much in return.  She would gladly help my sister or me when we needed help with any jobs.  She always told me, “If you can’t say something good, don’t say anything at all.”  I think these are important words to live by.  Nana loved her grandkids and they loved their “NANA”.  When Alzheimer’s took her from us, we wept and missed our mom and Nana and her devotion to us.


     When she first entered the nursing home's special care unit, she could have almost been put on the housecleaning staff.  If you gave her a cloth she would happily walk around and dust things.  She was also somewhat of a mother hen.  She gave great smiles and spread laughter with some of her antics.  She would often tell the staff how pretty or beautiful they were while gently touching their faces.  She would also tell them how sweet they were.  One of the nurses told me Mom would come up behind them and give them a little “pop” on the bottom and then run away laughing before they could see who had done it.  Mom even started to dance around when they had music or when I played “heart and soul” on the piano.  She got lots of exercise walking the unit and going outdoors with her family.  She was also well known for her bicycling exercise.  She would plop down on a chair, bed, or sofa and start doing her exercise with her legs moving back and forth as if she were on her bike.   It was always wonderful when she would remember and say, “Ray or Raymond, Linda, or Tammie” In the beginning she would get angry if we asked her if Dad was an old goat.  She would say, “He’s not an old goat, he’s my sweetheart” One of the funniest things mom said while in the nursing home happened about a year before she passed away.  Mom was confined to a wheelchair at this point and she had been to lunch or just out and about and Shelly S., a family friend, who works as a social worker at E. Care Center,  was pushing her back to her room.  Another patient was wheeling herself down the hall in her wheelchair and she was complaining and griping, which is something she did on a regular basis.  At one time this lady had been mom’s roommate but then she had been placed in a private room—(thankfully, I might add!)  Mom hadn’t spoken in a while except for an occasional word or phrase.  Mom looked at her and said, “Will you be quiet?  I’ve had just about enough of you!!”  So you can see mom could still be a little feisty!!!

  

     Alzheimer's was never able to take my mom’s sweet spirit and warm beautiful smile.  She’s not suffering today, and I can see her up in heaven maybe even dancing a little, but whatever she’s doing, she has a big beautiful smile on her face.

      Take action against Alzheimer's by clicking here.  If you know someone that has Alzheimer's, visit and talk to them.  You never know what words might trigger memories for them.  Support other family members and friends that have relatives with this disease.  If you are interested in donating to the Memory Walk, I have a very dear student that I had in my 2nd grade class about 12 years ago that is participating in the walk.

From the Alzheimer's Association:

"Memory Walk is the nation's largest event to raise awareness and funds for Alzheimer care, support and research. Since 1989, Memory Walk has raised more than $300 million for the cause.  All Memory Walk donations benefit the Alzheimer's Association, the leading voluntary health organization in Alzheimer care, support and research. The mission of the Alzheimer's Association is to eliminate Alzheimer's disease through the advancement of research; to provide and enhance care and support for all affected; and to reduce the risk of dementia through the promotion of brain health."

If roses grow in Heaven

This is my 3rd Mother's Day without my mom. For my husband it's been much longer, I think about 24 years. I can't say much cause it makes me cry. I found this poem and thought it was appropriate. To our moms, we love and miss you!

If roses grow in Heaven, Lord

Please pick a bunch for me.

Place them in my Mother's arms

and tell her they're from me.

Tell her I love her and miss her,

and when she turns to smile,

place a kiss upon her cheek

and hold her for a while.

Because remembering her is easy,

I do it everyday,

but there is an ache within my heart

That will never go away.

author unknown

Snow Angels and Snow Ice Cream--Special things my mom taught me with lots of love

Today I write in memory of my mom who was born on Feb. 15, 1925. Growing up I was surrounded with love and encouragement. I remember so many things I did growing up. Two things my mom taught me were making snow angels and snow ice cream. Due to our bountiful snowfall, I was able to do both this weekend. I think my mom is watching over me and I'm remembering her as my special Valentine since she was born the day after Valentine's Day.

Mom and her baby sister Lottie Bell

Good times. Lots of love and laughter. My mom taught me how to treat people, how to cook and clean and a multitude more life lessons. I don't do things as good as my mom, but I try. I strive to be a better person because I know what she expected of me. She expected me to "straighten up and fly right".

Christmas Eve and Love You Forever

Post #2
It's just hubby and me at home right now. Sarah is working and Jordan is in Tulsa with his wife and in-laws. We trade out Thanksgiving and Christmas each year. As the song "Let it snow" says, "The weather outside is frightful. We were on our way to our family Christmas and we saw several wrecks and a car turned sideways on the bridge right in front of us and then it couldn't get traction to go any further. This was around 5 pm and I wasn't feeling too secure in driving another 45 minutes in the blowing snow and blistery wind. Soooooo I told hubby we should turn around and go home. He was so sweet and said we could keep going. We did drive further, but the roads and traffic were getting worse. In the meantime I was worrying about Sarah getting to the hospital so I called my niece, Shelly, and told her we weren't going to make it because of the weather and road condtions and she started crying. I was getting teary too, but I thought I can't start crying too much cause I will make her cry more. You see we were already going to be missing my kids at our Christmas Eve celebration. This is our first Christmas without my dad and her papa and the 2nd Christmas without my mom and her nana. I remember every year dad would have some excuse for not going to Shelly's and usually it would involve the weather. Dad would say, "I'm not getting out cause it's going to be too cold" or "If it's raining, I can't go cause the roads will be bad" or "I'm too old to get out at night". This would start weeks before Christmas. I would tell him "Daddy, you are going to Shelly's" I would also tell him, "Don't worry about it right now. Let's just wait and see what the weather is doing and I can always come by and pick you up." I think now that maybe he just needed us to tell him that we needed him to be there to celebrate Christmas with us.

Thinking about this and not being able to go to our family Christmas causes tears to slowly fall down my cheeks. I was also watching a dreaded Lifetime movie called "The Christmas Hope" and there was a scene with a woman reading Robert Munsch's book, "Love You Forever". I immediately told hubby, "Oh this is a great book but it's so sad." I was telling him how we used it at our Mother's Day celebration with our first graders and their moms and there wouldn't be a dry eye in the room as each child read an excerpt from the book. I was also thinking of my mom and singing to her in October 2007 every Christmas song I could think of.
If you haven't read this book, you need to. It's a winner and a definite keeper. The pictures make the story better but I'm sure you can understand why the tears fall when listening once more to this story.

Love You Forever

by Robert Munsch

A mother held her new baby and very slowly rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she held him, she sang:

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be.

The baby grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was two years old, and he ran all around the house. He pulled all the books off the shelves. He pulled all the food out of the refrigerator and he took his mother's watch and flushed it down the toilet. Sometimes his mother would say, "this kid is driving me CRAZY!"

But at night time, when that two-year-old was quiet, she opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor, looked up over the side of his bed; and if he was really asleep she picked him up and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. While she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be.

The little boy grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was nine years old. And he never wanted to come in for dinner, he never wanted to take a bath, and when grandma visited he always said bad words. Sometimes his mother wanted to sell him to the zoo!

But at night time, when he was asleep, the mother quietly opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor and looked up over the side of the bed. If he was really asleep, she picked up that nine-year-old boy and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be.

The boy grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was a teenager. He had strange friends and he wore strange clothes and he listened to strange music. Sometimes the mother felt like she was in a zoo!

But at night time, when that teenager was asleep, the mother opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor and looked up over the side of the bed. If he was really asleep she picked up that great big boy and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. While she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be.

That teenager grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was a grown-up man. He left home and got a house across town. But sometimes on dark nights the mother got into her car and drove across town. If all the lights in her son's house were out, she opened his bedroom window, crawled across the floor, and looked up over the side of his bed. If that great big man was really asleep she picked him up and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be.

Well, that mother, she got older. She got older and older and older. One day she called up her son and said, "You'd better come see me because I'm very old and sick." So her son came to see her. When he came in the door she tried to sing the song. She sang:

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always...

But she couldn't finish because she was too old and sick. The son went to his mother. He picked her up and rocked her back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And he sang this song:

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my Mommy you'll be.

When the son came home that night, he stood for a long time at the top of the stairs. Then he went into the room where his very new baby daughter was sleeping. He picked her up in his arms and very slowly rocked her back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while he rocked her he sang:

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be.

After the woman finished reading the story in the movie and was crying, sweet hubby made me laugh when he said, "Do you want to call Jordan and sing to him?" So sweet Jordie and Sarah,
I sing to you this Christmas Eve on my blog,

"I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be"

To my Shelly,
I love you and miss you and hope to see you soon. As I have told myself many times this year, knowing my kids wouldn't be home to celebrate Christmas on the 24th and 25th, that Christmas doesn't have to be a certain day--it can be whenever you're with your family. Merry Christmas!!

My mom and dad and my kids

I was born 14 years after my sister. I'm not sure and never asked why the big gap between us? I often wondered--conception problems? no sex? was i an accident? i know i was supposed to be a boy though and my dad lost a bet.

I think my dad looks like a gangster in this picture. Look at those ears!!

Sister and mom have some tight curls in this picture!!


I am so thankful my kids have wonderful memories of times with their Nana and Papa. They were not fortunate enough to know hubby's parents. Grandparents play such an important part in a child life. Maybe that's what is wrong with me. I can only remember my mom's mom, Mama Nix. I only remember her as being old. She lived with us for a while, but I have no memories of staying at her house, playing games, or just spending time together and that makes me sad. My sister does though and she has told me stories.

When Jordan and Sarah were younger, they spent lots of time with their grandparents. They spent the night, played Sorry, Wheel of Fortune, and Hide and Seek. Nana cooked whatever they wanted. We went on several vacations together and one of our favorite places to go was Silver Dollar City.

Jordan and Sarah entertaining Nana and Papa

Remembering my Mom on Mother's Day

This was my 2nd mother's day without my mom so yesterday I made one of the favorite recipes that she used to make me. It was delicious. Now I didn't have buttered homemade biscuits, but it was still pretty darn good. Surprise someone with this for breakfast or as a dessert. I think you will love it if you like chocolate. To my kids: next time you are all here, I'm going to make you some chocolate gravy because I love you so very much and I don't remember if your nana ever made it for you.


Paula Deen's Chocolate Gravy:

1/3 stick butter
2/3 cup sugar
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1/3 cup cocoa
2 cups whole milk
Heat butter in a cast iron skillet over low heat. Mix in sugar, flour and cocoa. Slowly pour 1 cup of milk into the skillet and whisk well to remove lumps. Whisk in remaining milk, stirring constantly, until mixture is thick, being careful not to scorch. Serve hot over biscuits.

***my changes: no cast iron skillet, 1% milk, instead of 1/3 cup cocoa, i put 2 TBS. cocoa and 2 TBS. semi-sweet chocolate chips. i also add a pinch of cinnamon.

REVIEW: BEST CHOCOLATE GRAVY RECIPE I HAVE MADE, almost as good as my mama's.

my beautiful and sweet mama

 

mama and me in 1958

 

August 18, 1979

 

Nana at Sarah's 2nd birthday, April 1989

 

Papa, Jordan, and Nana at Silver Dollar City in 1989

 

Dad and Mom at Christmas at Shelly's house

 

My dad always said to my mom, "Give me some sugar or kiss me slobber lips, i'm thirsty!!" Goofy, I know but oh, they loved each other and taught me how to love and be loved. As my tears flow, I am reminded once again of how much I miss her.

Crawfish and Crawfishing

please take note i wrote CRAWFISH not crayfish. i'm from the south and i don't say crayfish--that sounds a bit too proper. i say it a certain way also, sort of slow and drawn out like craaaaww fish.

I talked to my son on Sunday and he said, "Mom, I tried a new food and I LOVE IT!!" He then asked me to guess what it was. Knowing my son and how picky he is/was, I wasn't very successful cause I don't really think of him being an adventurous eater! So he ended up having to tell me he ate crawfish.



and he loved them!! he played with them. he named them. then he tore their tails off, and ate the meat. last but not least he sucked their heads. and it was good. no, not quite right---they were delicious!! this made me laugh so much. i can see my goofy and all grown up, but still my baby boy playing with crawfish and naming them and then eating them.

ugghh! can't say i care to indulge in his newly acquired food choice. his bride seemed to have more of what i feel would be my reaction to eating them. she didn't like them. i loved her description of them. she said the underneath side when cooked looked like a roach. DISGUSTING!!! can't say that i want to eat roaches.

so my son has come a long way in expanding his diet and he quite literally shocked me with this current food. i don't think i will join him in eating them though cause....

i have amazingly wonderful memories of crawfishing with my mama. you could call me a farm girl. i didn't grow up with many indulgences, but i didn't do without either if that makes any sense. here's my story that i shared at her memorial service:

I think some of my fondest memories with my mom involve the simplest things. She took delight in the small things in life. I remember her teaching me how to go crawfishing. For those of you that don’t know what a crawfish is—they are scary little crustaceans with beady little eyes and scary pinchers like lobsters.



We would go to the ditch in front of our house after a rain and we would see their piles of dirt around the hole to their house. Mom would put some salt pork or a little raw bacon on a string with a little horseshoe nail for a weight and she would drop it into the hole just a little bit. A crawfish just might slowly crawl to the top, grab the pork with their pinchers and then try to pull it back further into their hole, but then of course we would pull them out of the hole while they were still attached to the string. I would usually scream and mom would tell me to be quiet and put the crayfish in the big bucket we had brought with us. I might try to do it, but I couldn’t ever grab them though because I was terrified the pinchers would grab me. So in the end it was always Mom who put them in the bucket. We could do this for a long time and she would delight in how they scared me, but would still try to touch me with one. I remember once it rained and rained and the pasture flooded and King’s Creek overflowed. We took a long walk with our bucket and caught tons of crawfish-well maybe not tons but it looked like it to a little girl. Now you may wonder what we did with all these crawfish. Did we cook’em and eat’em? Are you kidding? Now maybe my dad and mom had eaten them at some point, but we never did. We kept them in the bucket with some water and mud for a while and then we released them and the little creatures with their beady eyes and scary pinchers would scurry happily away.

***today i can still see my mama with her rolled up pants, sleeveless button down the front white shirt, and barefeet. we're walking with our big bucket, hoping to catch some crawfish.

My first baby quilt and a new love--sock monkeys :)

I've been sewing some lately and it's been really fun. A little known fact about me is I received the Betty Crocker Family Leadership Award in high school. It was pretty shocking actually and I've never quite lived up to Betty's fame. I mean I like to cook and try new recipes/foods, but I don't like the mess it makes and the cleanup that is required. I do enjoy making things though. The problem is I like to do lots of things, but I have become an expert in nothing. I started a baby quilt this year and haven't spent much time on it, but I didn't stay on task for long periods of time so it took a while. Here is my creation:



It's far from perfect and I learned some tricks and strategies that I can utilize before making the next one, but it is a super soft cuddly flannel. I know this is pretty goofy, but last night I wrapped the sock monkey in the blanket and took it to hubby and told him, "Here's your new grand monkey, don't you think he's cute?" He continues to think I'm weird and wonders from time to time why he married me, but I do think he must love me and my crazy ways. In case you are wondering, there are NO babies that I know that are arriving any time soon in my family. It was just a quilting project that I could conquer.

I love sock monkeys. I never had one growing up, but I've been searching the internet for them and I've found some great sock monkey fabric that I want to make another quilt with. If you see a sock monkey somewhere that doesn't cost an arm and a leg or something else with monkeys or sock monkeys, let me know. My mom used to call me her little monkey cause I was always climbing trees and when I was little I sucked my thumb for an extended period of time--like past the age of three. She tried and tried to get me to stop by taping my thumb with masking tape, putting that nasty don't suck your thumb stuff called "Thum" on it, but I just wouldn't stop. Finally she found a picture of a really ugly monkey sucking his/her thumb and told me that it was me and she posted it above my bed. Even though I was small, I remember thinking, "I'm not a monkey. I don't want to look like that!!!" So I stopped sucking my thumb almost overnight.

ALZHEIMER'S and LOSING SOMEONE YOU LOVE

Alzheimer's disease destroys lives--the lives of those you love. It robs people of their loved ones long before it should. For me, it took my beloved mom in Oct. of 2007, but in reality she was gone long before she left this world physically. Visiting my mom in the special care unit for 5+ years and missing her even though she was right there with me was a struggle. It was as if we switched rolls I was now her mother and she was my baby. Even though she failed to recognize me, she always had a smile for me. Her smiles were love unspoken.

Facts about Alzheimer's Disease:

As many as 5 million people in the United States are living with Alzheimer's.

Every 71 seconds, someone develops Alzheimer's.

10 million baby boomers will develop Alzheimer's in the United States.

100% Alzheimer's disease is always fatal.

June 2008 Update: Alzheimer's disease now sixth-leading cause of death.

Do you know the signs of Alzheimer's?

In 2007, the Alzheimer's Association started a campaign and set a goal to have 5 million people take action and join the cause. They are over 3 million short of this. Please sign up .

NANA'S TEACAKES

I've thought of my mom a great deal this weekend. Today was her birthday. My mom was known for her cooking. One of the special recipes she made was her teacakes. She used to make them and serve them warm from the oven. Sometimes she would add a little pat of butter on each one. They were so delicious. My kids did something very special, so special that it makes me cry to think of it. They made dozens and dozens of Nana's Teacakes for her memorial service. I was even able to help them bake some and that made us feel closer in our time of grief. I never really told them how much their actions touched me, but it is something I will never forget.

This is my mom's recipe in her handwriting.

 

Mama and me

 

Reasons to blog...

I can't remember the exact reason I started this blogging business. Now I guess you could say I have a blogging addiction. I'm connected to people I know and people I don't know personally, but wish I did. Some bloggers are so creative, some have wonderful photography skills, many are new moms, some are grandmoms, and some give me tips on how to save money, but regardless of who they are, I feel a certain connection to them. It's wonderful to have friends/acquaintances that you just met through blogging, but feel like you have known a lifetime. Today I ask you to pray for a new blogging friend, Kelly and her new baby, Harper.

As for me and my blogging, it's just a place for me to write down my thoughts--whether they be happy, sad, or even ridiculous. Maybe I write for my grown-up kids and my hubby so they can know what their crazy mom/wifey, who happens to love them immeasurably, is thinking and doing and maybe I can write more about my mom and their nana so they don't forget her and they can remember her before Alzheimer's took her away from us. Now I must go, cause those crazy crocodile tears are rolling once again...

My sweet mama

Thought for the day:




 

My mama's chocolate gravy

My mom was a wonderful person. She was also quite a character. I think I got many of my personality traits from her. She loved life and she also loved to laugh. She was well known in her circle of family and friends as a great cook. Many mornings she would prepare me a hot breakfast and for a special treat she would prepare something she called chocolate gravy. Her chocolate gravy was divine; it was melt in your mouth--stick to your ribs goodness especially when served over homemade buttered biscuits. I think of all the breakfasts she prepared this had to be my all time favorite. I don't have my mom's actual recipe, but I found this at www.allrecipes.com. I have made it several times and it's pretty yummy. I did half the recipe so maybe I wouldn't eat as much. I haven't served it over biscuits yet, just buttered toast. I've also eaten it straight from the pan as a warm pudding. I think it might also be good over waffles. So you can really make chocolate a breakfast food without guilt if you prepare it as chocolate gravy.


Chocolate Gravy II
SUBMITTED BY: MARY ANN PUTMAN

1/2 cup butter
4 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
3/4 cup white sugar
2 cups milk
(I also add a sprinkle of cinnamon)

DIRECTIONS
Melt butter in a saucepan or skillet over medium heat. Add cocoa and flour; stir until a thick paste is formed. Stir in sugar and milk. Cook, stirring constantly, until thickened.

As my sweet mama used to say, "You can make this in two shakes of a lamb's tail!"
Enjoy!